While I have always been an admirer of ambitious women I have also always been an advocate for freedom of choice. For the longest time I have been of the opinion that for a home to be run successfully, at least one of the partners involved has to be more domesticated. When I say domesticated in this instance I mean one of the two has to be concentrated more on the running of the house if they want to create time for the children and even for each other.
Traditionally, the role of home maker used to be that of a woman, but women have come a long way from that and I will not insult their struggle by suggesting that we go back to that. This is what I would suggest instead. I find that in most relationships there is already someone more suited to be the home maker and both already know this. If your mind has already nominated a woman to fill this position it’s not my fault that stereotype exists. I believe the more domesticated partner can be the man or the woman but that isn’t what makes us so nervous about playing the role of home maker.
For most men we have the egocentric thinking that tells us it is emasculating to take on such a role and there is also the problem of how women perceive men. I will venture into the land of assumptions and claim that most women are predisposed to being attracted by a financially successful man. This is not to be mistaken for gold digging! Being able to provide has long been an evolutionary advantage for men and that mentality still lives on. Women on the other hand face what I have now termed the ‘feminist stigma’. No man I know of has ever shown distaste over a woman deciding to get a job that afforded her more time at home (if the husband can afford it we don’t even mind full time housewives). Women on the other hand with the new ‘do you think I belong in the kitchen’ attitude have taken to talk down on other females that might have decided to become home markers.
It seems like in a world that demands more and more of our time, instead of running the family unit like a single household we have adopted an independent lifestyle over a cooperative one. Maybe it is time to start thinking about how we view relationship dynamics and how we think of the role of the home maker. Running a home is no easy task and sometimes could be the difference between a lasting relationship and a broken one.